


Contemplation

by uniquepov



Series: Lewis: The World, Transformed [7]
Category: Lewis (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-15
Updated: 2012-10-15
Packaged: 2017-11-16 08:36:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/537552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uniquepov/pseuds/uniquepov
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James contemplates his dream.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Contemplation

**Author's Note:**

> _“The moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delight, the ecstasy of it, you will discover the world, transformed.”_ ~~ Jiddu Krishnamurti
> 
> I do not own Lewis, Hathaway, or any of the others; only the plot is mine, and I make no profit from these scribblings. I'm just playing in Colin Dexter's sandbox for a while.

James sat in the dark, his hand gripping Lewis’ tightly, the other hand still splayed across his governor’s chest, taking refuge in the steady rise and fall. It had only been a bad dream. 

_Just a dream._ He sent the thought up to heaven like the prayer it was. _Just a dream._

His mind replayed the nightmare, endlessly looping from the moment Travisham had bolted to the moment they had shut him out of A & E. Each time, the moment of the fall, when Lewis’ eyes had darted to his own, took on greater significance.

People said that your life flashed before your eyes when you were facing death. Lewis should have been thinking of Val, of Lyn and Mark, of his grandchild… Why had Lewis’ eyes sought out _his_?

James had no answer for it, and if there was one thing that got under his skin, it was a puzzle he couldn’t solve. His mind gnawed on the problem, worrying away at it until, finally, his sleep-deprived brain slotted the pieces into place.

The emergency notification.

Dr Hobson’s cryptic comment.

The evidence that Lewis’ final thought before falling had been of James.

_Bloody hell._

He could hardly credit the idea, and yet…

And yet.

Was it even possible? Could he really be _that_ important to Lewis?

James knew that the amount of time the two spent together went far beyond a governor mentoring his bagman. Knew that the pints and takeaways and pub meals all added up to a friendship, at the very least.

But what if there was something more?

James hadn’t given relationships a lot of thought, at least not since Fiona has taken that promotion and moved on with her life. And Zoe –Feardorcha– had had far more to do with his guilt over Will’s death than any sexual attraction.

Deep in his heart, he could admit, now, that he was attracted to both sexes; it had been this inconvenient fact which had convinced him to leave the seminary.

But was it attraction that he felt for Lewis? For _Robbie_ , he amended. If he was going to follow this train of thought, he supposed he should start using Christian names.

He liked and respected Robbie, certainly. Enjoyed his company. Cared about his well being, enough so that his heart had nearly stopped when he looked down at him, lying still at the bottom of the staircase. A most embarrassing blush would always rise up his neck at a growled “good lad” from him.

And what about Robbie? Thirty years married, and he would be still, if not for Val’s untimely death. He was the last man James would suspect of being bisexual. Or, at least, being of fluid sexuality. Still, anything was possible, he supposed. Life could be a strange and wonderful thing.

The more James thought on it, the less clear the answers became. This appeared to be one riddle he might well need Robbie to help him solve.

 _Wake up, sir,_ he prayed. _Please._

**Author's Note:**

> Once again, as a writing exercise, each installment of this fic is 500 words exactly. Hope you enjoy! Many thanks, as always, to those who leave comments and kudos. They are very much appreciated.


End file.
